also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
