brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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