If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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