I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
