Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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