Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
hell yes lets make some ravioli
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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