I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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