Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
