sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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