So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard