i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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