you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
