what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
