This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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