I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
