i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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