I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
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