He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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