There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
You're like the curious george of whores
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
