you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to