Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i feel rough

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): i feel rough (617): just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE. http://tfl.nu/6foz
  Replies (24) Good night (824) Bad night (1889)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ? http://tfl.nu/isdq
  Replies (17) Good night (1326) Bad night (3959)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now. http://tfl.nu/qiaj
  Replies (40) Good night (8898) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together? http://tfl.nu/xjvt
  Replies (38) Good night (5932) Bad night (1751)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling... http://tfl.nu/p0v8
  Replies (15) Good night (5918) Bad night (1047)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle. http://tfl.nu/61o1
  Replies (18) Good night (1086) Bad night (7800)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.

  (219): View more from Indiana

  You said that last year...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate. (219): You said that last year... http://tfl.nu/7qlf
  Replies (18) Good night (2099) Bad night (5554)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself. http://tfl.nu/qkn1
  Replies (2) Good night (968) Bad night (2413)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa. http://tfl.nu/kz18
  Replies (3) Good night (1937) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window

  (212): View more from New York

  i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window (212): i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there http://tfl.nu/q2cr
  Replies (3) Good night (1034) Bad night (495)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle http://tfl.nu/mlt6
  Replies (4) Good night (462) Bad night (796)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring. http://tfl.nu/7yo3
  Replies (1) Good night (505) Bad night (369)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough http://tfl.nu/hw2m
  Replies (0) Good night (417) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS http://tfl.nu/7wbc
  Replies (0) Good night (544) Bad night (209)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night http://tfl.nu/wd4l
  Replies (1) Good night (498) Bad night (169)

Randomize