just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize