Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
We just shotgunned beers for America
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
