he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
