Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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