After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
