barbara walters just said penis...
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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