I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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