dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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