Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
