What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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