A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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