Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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