nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
