do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
