Whod you bang
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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