If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
so much tequila, so little girl.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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