their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Randomize
