love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
