words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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