Your tits are I can't wait for
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
