i just had sex bonerless
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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