Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
