? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
