dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
