Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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