just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
