Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Houston, we have a squirter
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
