Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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