Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
