Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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